Dear Friend Who’s Nervous About Hospitality

Dear Friend Who's Nervous About Hospitality | A Simple Haven

I get it. It’s a little scary.

Inviting people into your home is inviting them into your life. And maybe that’s the part that feels most awkward–because you’ve only just met and you’re neighbors and is it weird to just invite them over for dinner?

Or maybe not. Maybe inviting people over doesn’t feel weird, but you have all these Pinterest-y images floating in your head of perfect table settings, fancy food, and elaborate themed parties.

And you’ve got four little kids to keep up with or your work full time outside the home or you’re pregnant or you just had a baby. In any case, you’re maxed out. So making anything worthy of pinning feels laughable.

Maybe it’s your home. It’s a total work in progress. And you’re not sure you’re comfortable letting people in in the midst of the progress.

Or maybe there’s no progress going on or it’s too small or too old or too…whatever.

Can I just tell you something?

It’s not weird to invite people in. Ok, it might be a little awkward. You may not connect with your guests on every front. You may not end up best friends.

But that’s ok. If your interest in the other person is genuine and you offer food or drinks and a comfortable place to sit, your company will be blessed.

Speaking of the food? Those cheese and crackers you offered me the other day were perfect. Really. I’d forgotten how lovely buttery rounds of crispy goodness are with cheddar.

So when your guests come this weekend, just make something easy. Some old standby. Shoot, pick a favorite meal and designate it the “company meal.” Make it whenever you have guests.

And your home? It’s just fine. More than fine.

It’s not perfect, but no home is.  There are things you’d like to change–but that’s a subject for another day.

For now, just light some candles (they cover a multitude of sins), pour some tea, and put on some nice tunes. Offer a smile and ask good questions.

That laundry in the corner? I didn’t even notice. Or, if I did, it just made me smile and feel more at home.

You may still be nervous about hospitality. That’s ok. Do it anyway. It gets easier, I promise.

Does opening your home freak you out a little? Or does your house feel incomplete without guests? 🙂

About Jenn

Jenn is a mommy of three and wife to her best friend. She enjoys good books, dinner guests, elevenses, and proper apostrophe use.

  • Christy Staats

    I should be editing for my work right now but I got a little notice you posted (darn it Apple! Those safari notices in the top corner of my screen are death to the -distractible-as-a-cat person! 🙂

    I love this.

    Too many women live their lives in fear of hosting and they are missing out on a lot by being so self conscious. Your post hits the spot.

    • You’re right–it’s the self-consciousness that gets us! If I just forget about myself/house/laundry/etc. and focus on the other person, it’s loads easier to open the door.

  • This post is so encouraging. I used to make sure my home and the meal were as Pinterest-ry as possible, but no matter how well I did, I was still aware that others are doing it better. It wasn’t until I realized that our guests want to feel at home and relaxed. When I know that someone slaved all day to have us over for dinner, I am less relaxed than when I know they invited us in just as they are. Our guests come to spend time with us, not to see a magazine-worthy home. Thank you for the reminder to focus on the people, not the presentation!

    • So true about people just coming to spend time with us. Thanks for dropping at note, Heather!